mercredi 14 mai 2008

european boys

"The world you desired can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it's yours." -- Ayn Rand.

I was at Breakfast In America, the American restaurant that we love oh-so-much when we're missing good ol' heart attack inducing American food, with Lucia yesterday. She was craving American breakfast. We both got breakfast burritos. We sat at that "inside outside" part of a restaurant that I was telling you about (see the "un jour férié" post). To our left comes the most cutest boy. He wore loose-fitting jeans and a black t-shirt that's seen too many washes and is probably at its peak of softness. He was tan, but not too tan, and tall, but not too tall, and he had short, perfectly tousled brown hair. He said to the waitress, "Hello. Bonjour. (insert soft spoken French here)". He then sat at the table beside us with his back to us. I'm pretty sure Lucia and I gasped collectively at this boy. Two words, and we were in love.

You've probably been reading this blog long enough to know that I have not made many European guy friends during my time here. I've been a hermit, curled up in my cozy shell. After spending time with Adriano, Andrea and meeting other European guys on this trip...I'm just blown over how amazing these guys are. I hate to compare them to my guy friends back home, but, wow--these guys are different. In a really good way. Because of them, I've really raised my standards. They're just more mature, intelligent, and still young at heart. They like to travel and care about learning different languages. They're close to their families. They practice rules of chivalry (some!). They know how to dress (all!). And I know that dressing part is so superficial but I think it shows that they take pride in their appearance and that they have confidence and creativity. Fashion is for everyone, not just girls.

Anyway, Lucia, Keisha, and I were talking about this on one of our long lunches in Italy, and we all agree--the guys are just better here. Sorry, American boys. Of course, there are downsides that I have not yet seen, but there will always be downsides.

Andrea said something during dinner when we were talking about boys again. I won't say what prompted him to say this or to whom but what he said was, "That's because you've only dated American boys."

That's because you've only dated American boys.

God, the whole world has never felt so big, so full of possibility before. Italian boys, French boys, Serbian boys (my Vatican tour guide!). All this time I thought I had it perfectly set, that I'd meet boys back in CA, maybe at school, just like most of the girls I knew, and if that didn't work, then there'd be boys at work maybe. I just always thought that it'd be simple, somehow something would work out, that I'd probably settle because, God, I'd be lucky to find someone who could stand me. That's what I believed. That I'd probably settle. Even when Mom specifically told me one day when we were talking about boys: "Don't settle."

She's right. I deserve what I want. We all do. Now the easy way, the set way that I had in my head doesn't interest me. The world is bigger than my life back home. That was evident when I came here. I don't have to settle. We don't have to settle. What we want is possible if we're willing to take chances, to be open. What does it matter if English is his second language, what does it matter if French is mine. What does it matter if he lives a continent away. It doesn't. But how should I know...I don't. But it's good to know that this is where I stand.